So a couple of phone interviews inclusive of a Spanish language test and two personal interviews brings me to the point where I successfully argue my starting wage UP to a whopping $9.50 an hour….bringing me almost to the point where I can afford to purchase the lavish benefits bestowed upon Home Depot employees……so yesterday I take the plunge and head on out for the 8 hour Home Depot Indoctrination……
15 minutes into the “indoctrination” some kind of big wheel comes in and stands directly behind me just in time to listen to my phone….which I thought I shut off….ring loud and clear. My friend Ken checking up on me while simultaneously disturbing the entire class. I think they were disturbed as all 24 people in the room shut up to stare at me….. I took this as an omen and gave the whole group my best “fucku” glare back as its likely this is to be another of my historically monumentally short career choices.
Now they’ve offered a few weeks at 39 hours a week …not so bad…but did mention the possibility / probability that summer hours would be….well, pretty skinny and the reason I accepted the $9.50….same money as the 20 yr old mouth breather that came aboard with me was that there was a monetary revue come April.
Fair enough…….no problem being the best mother fucker on the floor of HD and I can try it till April to see what kind of raise I can earn….only to discover the April they are talking about isn’t this one coming…..they are talking the following one…..WOW….suddenly not so enthused. I mean a friend of ours was just offered more as a dish washer….
So…….product and tool knowledge and the ability to impart advice in two languages is worth exactly what they offer a pod to retrieve shopping carts for a year….tomorrow is the first day and the jury is still out on whether I show or not….but its looking less and less likely with each cerveza……
