I awoke to the memory of the beginning of the evening previous. I’m not sure if what had awakened me was the intense early morning Australian sun bullying its way through the windshield in its effort to scorch my face to the second degree. Or perhaps the seemingly loud and excruciating sound of the Kookaburras’ laughter from high in the gum trees on Des’ front lawn.
Des had in inordinate ability to abuse an adult beverage along with a profound skill of enticing others to do the same. Because of this many considered him a danger not just to himself but society in general. I must confess I myself felt nervous over my own occasional ability to keep up with him and so didn’t visit as often as he might have liked. On this particular occasion I had walked into his kitchen early that previous evening to the heartfelt greeting of his strong Australian twang …..
“ G’day Mate! Bloody glad yer ere….owzit goin?”
Immediately a freshly cracked cap from a bottle of Des’ favorite Irish whiskey was thrown across the room with practiced precision to land where Des believed all caps to bottles of Irish should be…the trash. We solved the woes of the world that night along with many of our own before I finally had to leave. Now in contradiction of straight logic there are times when over abuse of alcohol can actually make one a safer driver. The proof in this was the next morning when the previously described awakening found me in a vehicle exactly where I had parked it some twelve hours past, disabled by my house keys forced entry into the ignition switch.
I’m not quite certain where I found the strength to insert that key in such an unlikely place and as we removed it with a pair of vice grips Des gave me pause to ponder ….
“Cor Mate…were yer trying ta drive …or let yerself in?”
I’m betting I was trying to let myself in…..I’d be too embarrassed to admit I tried to drive in such condition.
